.//cheryl-ann-
the beautiful disaster, hopelessly and recklessly needing the boy. giving this her all, the last semblance of trust left within. this is imperfection perfected, in her heart

[[she drowns in her dreams. an exquisite extreme, she knows. she's as damned as she seems, and more heaven than a heart could hold
she's soft to the touch. but frayed at the end, she breaks. she's never enough, and still she's more than one can take]]




.escapism
benji ching<3 daph epicurean marcus koh mel tan nana song xia yanqi eddie hui min junz michelle peiying sam terence* weihui annabelle anthony asher ashley belinda dunstan grace jingyi nikki adeline<3 ashley aurelia(: brian cheryl<3 cheryl ong eileen huimin izzie jamie jas<3 jia ker<3 marc mirah noven pearlyn ron rach rui sha shane theresa<3 wanling wyn yanxi val<3

.the dark room

.triggered. 051404 052504 052904 "Ride Of Our Lives" tuition peeps school Odds and Ends Canada 2004 HIStoryMakers5!! Choir :)) hangin' and chillin' sevens'05 day 1 sevens'05 day 2 May 22. 2005 Trinity Camp at Rawson St Kilda Masquerade Ball


.haunted past

May 2004 June 2004 July 2004 August 2004 September 2004 October 2004 November 2004 December 2004 January 2005 February 2005 March 2005 April 2005 May 2005 June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 November 2005

January 02, 2005

Powerful Word today. But somehow there wasn't any flow. I'm really going through a very dry season and I'm so tired now. I never felt anything during service. Even during worship. It felt like I was going through the motions. Like yeah, now open your mouth, sing and raise your hands in worship :\ Then right before altar call, Pastor said "let him/her go". I am so sure it was God. It wasn't Pastor, it was God! I know it was. The moment the words left his mouth, tears flowed. And damn, it hurts. It hurts to know I'm holding on to something that will never be. Ah I don't know anything right now. I just have this bad feeling about the new year. And no matter what anyone says, it's so hard for me to expect great things from God right now. I see everyone around me doing great. I see God working in them, moulding them to be great men and women of God. I see my friends leaving to pursue their future and I know it is possible only by God's grace. Then I see myself. I look at myself and see a choked up girl forgotten by the world. I sometimes feel like I'm the leftover for God to bless. Like after all His blessed sons and daughters, He sees me out in the cold and pities me. SOMETIMES! I need constant REassurance from Him. And past all the reassurances, I seek something tangible. A love that is tangible. I feel like even though He might love me for who I am, He still isn't tangible. He isn't there to hold me when I'm crying, isn't there to physically dry my tears. I need someone there for me. What in the world is wrong with me?


+..all cried out..+ . [9:32 PM